In "President Bush sings U2's Sunday Bloody Sunday."

Oh man I've had the full video of the eels shooting out of the ass on my hard drive for years. I just can't bring myself to delete it. What you missed is that one chick pours live eels into the other one's ass via a funnel inserted into the asshole, followed by closeups of the girl trying squint her eyes to pretend that feels so. damn. good., then she rockets them out of her ass, as per the clip, and THEN, the other chick picks up one of the eels freshly coated with ass sauce, and eats it alive, opening her mouth to give us a nice view of...god, I'm done with this description.

In "Roller"

Image hosting by Photobucket the bosses from both my jobs on the right, and another lady i work with on the left. they're on an atlanta roller derby team called the TOXIC SHOCKS, which gratifies me spiritually in ways i can't really articulate. everyone should attend at least one roller derby bout in their life, making sure to go early to tailgate in the parking lot with ridiculous amounts of booze.

In "Curious George: Who's Dumb to You?"

Hoosiers. The fucking. Hoosiers. At least Kentucky has horses. ::grumbles::

In "Curious George: What's in a username?"

I was home for the first summer after my freshman year of college, and we were tunneling through the filth in the back of my best friend's mom's car when we dug up this book called Kissed by Shadows by Jane Feather. It was one of those trashy romance novels that one finds so comforting because it lets you slip into the belief that your parents are no longer havin' at the havin's and your mom's only release is trashy romance novels. Anyway, the main character's name was Lady Pippa Nielson and the book was insanely graphic. I seem to recall one scene in particular where she is rubbing Lionel Ashton's...bits on her cheek and he literally says "Nay Pippa, that is enough." At the time I thought my trusty old Volvo Binky might be done for good, and that I would need a new car, which would have to be named Pippa. But Binks made it through, so I made Pippa Feather my new handle. I use it for all websites. And may name my firstborn Pippa too. I dunno, we'll see.

In "Curious. George tabbed browsing."

p.s. i use both a mac and pc, hence the discontinuities in my tabbing problems/apple terminology.

I just like that I can apple + (tab#) to whatever tab I want instead of trying to remember the order of the windows I've opened and having to alt+tab through 17 screens to get to the one I want. And it's cleaner, etc. And it takes my computer way longer to load a new window than it does to load a new tab. And it makes it easier when you're researching - all tabs for one subject in one window, tabs for another subject in another window. Apple+w will just close the active tab, if you're having problems closing the entire window when you just want to close a tab. This has probably all been said in the thread, but I didn't read the whole thing. Ah well.

In "Death to all pitt bulls!"

Well thanks for making me cry, Denver. Thanks a fucking lot. Pit bulls have a reputation for being dangerous because the people who buy them want them to be dangerous. When you don't have the money to buy a well-trained guard dog, the best way to keep him aggressive is to treat him badly, and that's when they go mad and maul babies, etc. But I bet I can get a golden retriever to maul a baby if I raised it the right/(wrong) way. As soon as I can afford it and am settled down enough, I'm getting a Rottweiler - another dog with a terrible reputation that is actually a very loyal family dog. They're actually really good with children (::GASP!::). Banning the dogs I would be upset with, but fine, you can't have wolves as pets either, I could see their logic. But KILLING the dogs? I f'real want to cry. They're just so damn pretty...

In "No Child Left Behind,"

According to the Federal Register notice, the data will be open to "those who require the records in the performance of their official duties." It said the data would be protected by passwords. The system also gives the Pentagon the right, without notifying citizens, to share the data for numerous uses outside the military, including with law enforcement, state tax authorities and Congress. That's what creeps me out about this, not that they're trying to up recruitment. I understand that they're scrambling now that they've fucked up and joined a fairly embarrassing war (in my opinion) that no one wants to sign up for, but there has to be a better way to go about it, and one without such sinister undertones to it. As for recruiters pounding down my door, I graduated high school 2 years ago and for some reason they decided they absolutely HAD to have me in the service. I thought maybe they were trying to get more girls to sign up, bc the guy was insanely persistent. I tried to explain over and over again that he REALLY didn't want me in the armed forces, certainly nowhere near a gun, and that my 20 lb anemic ass need not be in charge of protecting anyone or their freedom. He told me I could study whatever I wanted in the army, offered a wide variety of possibilities (no, I don't want to be an engineer, thanks. No I don't want to be a chaplain either, I don't believe in god, thanks.), but I'm not sure what type of creative writing program the army has, and whether or not poetry is one of their strong suits. They've seriously gone mad with this business.

In "It is time."

Ooooh congrats! I also feel as though pictures should be involved at some point. But crotch fruit? Chyren, I think I might have to <333 you.

In "The Tigers roar!"

Orococo: I can't tell if you're joking or not, but if you're not, I totally want to give you a noogie. ... NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOGIEEEEEEEEEEEEE! I'm Indian, I'm allowed. Cricket's just what we do.

In "Curious George:"

The Tired Sickle

In "Reason #33 why you don't give creative control to your keyboard player"

Techsmith - I stole a porcupine tree cd from my brother a couple years ago, burned it, wiped away the finger prints and carefully replaced it, along with the speck of dust he placed on the edge to make sure it hadn't been moved (he doesn't like sharing things), but I never got around to listening to it. Is it any good?

In "Okay, this is disturbing: RealDolls Museum"

dude, the one with the baby about to breast feed is not okay with me. It just isn't.

In "Treat your mother right."

Oh god I need to change my panties now. Thanks for posting, I'm sending this to everyone I love enough. ::SQUEEEE!!!::

In "I'm wearing my boots of escaping"

yeah, that's patton oswalt. reno 911 gets some boss cameos. my favorites are when nick swardson plays the male-prostitute on rollerskates.

In "Boy who raped teacher given life."

That's nigh the saddest/creepiest thing I've heard today. This kid was clearly abused..."By 1995, when this boy could not yet have been four, he was being mistreated and indeed encouraged to engage in misuse of alcohol and cigarettes"? Fuck whoever fucked him up, and (as much as I hate to say this about someone who I assume has been sexually abused or at least exposed to it as well) fuck him too. (angriness may be due to drunkness/general depressedness)

In "HULK'S DIARY THAT IS ON THE INTERNET"

Oh god I remember seeing this a while back! I completely forgot to keep up with it though, thanks for posting

In "Curious George"

I heard her call herself Low-an on tv somewhere. Also: I hate myself for knowing the answer to that question.

In "Puppies!"

Oh my god I must have him. And maybe her. Together, we will teach the world to love.

In "I clawed out my eyes, but I can still see!"

my throat burns a little now from choking down vomit . Thanks for that. ::drinks water::

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